About friendship

applesandporn:

realsocialskills:

seraseatscissers:

realsocialskills:

seraseatscissers:

realsocialskills:

If someone doesn’t like you, they aren’t your friend, and you shouldn’t be hanging out with them.

If someone is always telling you why you’re not good enough, they don’t like you.

If someone is always telling you how special it is that they like someone as flawed as you, then they don’t like you.

If someone consistently expresses contempt about you to mutual friends, they don’t like you.

Life is better when you spend your time with nice people who like you.

shit i wish i knew this at school

also i wish my school had even the slightest bit of provision for allowing me to avoid/stop hanging out with people that didn’t like me

Me too. School often actively prevents people from learning this, especially people who are considered socially incompetent.

That’s one of the reasons my blog is called realsocialskills.

yeah that’s very true, they keep trying to force this ‘you are going to have to get along with everyone’ thing onto vulnerable people which is fucked when half of your classmates are abusing you.

Right and also - there’s a fundamental difference between getting along with people professionally, vs considering people friends and spending time with them socially.

…And for the extra special fucked-up-ness: while the trying/pretending-to-be-friends kind of getting along is what they drill into you at school (especially if you are female), they never tell you that in actual work environments it can often be given as a reason not to promote someone (especially female someones) because they “just don’t have the necessary competitiveness.”

Huh. I didn’t know about that.