littleshopgirlgoestothemovies:

Social skills for autonomous people: hibikiniviking asked: What do you think about talking sexually (“I got…

realsocialskills:

What do you think about talking sexually (“I got a butt plug” kind of thing) in public (maybe at the mall) with friends? I like to talk about (often, gay) sex (it’s fun and liberating), and don’t care who hears, but there’s the issue of children sometimes…

Yeah, it’s really important that everyone in the actual conversation consents to be part of it. I think it’s slightly different for people around you in a public place (where they are able to leave) and might overhear you. People’s perceptions of what is and is not sexual/too much/inappropriate for a public place depends on who’s doing it. Most straight cis people have to get pretty explicit when they’re chatting to their friends before their conversations are seen as inappropriate by most other people but sometimes saying the word ‘girlfriend’ or 'queer’ or holding hands can be seen as inappropriate in a public space or a place with kids in it *because non-hetero language and displays of affection are often seen as inherently explicit* by a lot of people.

I think that it is worth remembering that a lot of conversations that use explicit language (as opposed to being perceived as explicit) need to be had. Talking about work, relationships, sex, gender, sexuality, or health is really important and can use explicit language. Not everybody has access to private space in their homes/a convention where they can have conversations about explicit topics. Sometimes these conversations need to happen in public places like parks and bars.