nice ladies

fierceawakening:

walkingsaladshooterfromheaven:

Nice Lady Therapists

realsocialskills:

Content warning: this post is about physical and emotional harm done to people (especially children) with disabilities by (mostly) female therapists. Proceed with caution.

This is a hard post to write. It’s…

fierceawakening said:

Sometimes the nice lady veneer is fading, too, and they snap at you because they’re “tired” or “overworked” and it’s too much work to “be nice” by which they mean the fake thing.

realsocialskills said:

Yes, that too. And sometimes they do that to all their clients but lead you to believe you’re the only one, and that they snap at you because you’re uniquely exhausting.

walkingsaladshooterfromheaven:

Nice Lady Therapists

realsocialskills:

Content warning: this post is about physical and emotional harm done to people (especially children) with disabilities by (mostly) female therapists. Proceed with caution.

This is a hard post to write. It’s about abuse. It’s about a kind of abuse I haven’t seen described much. I think…

walkingsaladshooterfromheaven said:

Not therapists specifically but other women in “helping” roles, particularly teachers/education professionals, have been this way to me.

In varying ways and to varying degrees. But there is a dynamic there.

It’s a “What I’m doing to you is for your own good and I’m being sweet and nice about it so you have no right to complain” sort of thing.

It’s subtle disrespect and dehumanization, in which they completely deny that that’s what they’re doing to you. It’s very gaslighty. And it is an attitude that is frequently encouraged among female education professionals.

It’s so terrifyingly ubiquitous and there are so very few guaranteed safe spaces from it.

Even women who do not normally have this attitude can take it on if they feel like you are being enough of a Problem to warrant it.

realsocialskills said:

Yes. As though being nice is a tone of voice, and that it does not require actual respect.

Nice lady therapists told me that restraint doesnt hurt, theyre keeping me safe. They put me in a baskethold and said it was a hug. They followed me to the bathroom when i was a teenager and made me do coloring sheets. They made me hug and cuddle and pretend to like it. They made me earn everything and acted like they were giving me a gift. If i didnt want their help it was problems accepting that others cared about me.
realsocialskills said:
 
I’m sorry that Nice Lady Therapists abused you in all of those ways. They shouldn’t have.