swears

calculusandcreamteas:

mellopetitone:

Hierarchies of cussing

realsocialskills:

I’ve never understood which swearwords are worse than others. It’s only in very recent years that I’ve heard people saying that the c-word is the worst of all. Before that I…

calculusandcreamteas said:

While freaking is in many ways a mild swear it is also a potential trigger for those bullied and harmed as a ‘freak’.

realsocialskills said:

I hadn’t thought of that. Do any of y'all also see it that way?

mellopetitone:

Hierarchies of cussing

realsocialskills:

I’ve never understood which swearwords are worse than others. It’s only in very recent years that I’ve heard people saying that the c-word is the worst of all. Before that I assumed the f-word was the worst swearword. Is there a pretty specific…

mellopetitone said:

Also, some words are considered swears by some and not by others. These, if considered swears or “bad words”, are generally considered to be some of the milder ones and, as mentioned in the original post, are often considered appropriate for some ages and not others. Examples are words like “crap”, “freaking”, “stupid”. (“Crap” is usually a substitute for “sh*t”. “Freaking” is usually a substitute for “f*cking”. “Freak” is only rarely a substitute for “f*ck”.)

These words are in a middle area where some people consider them swears/words that have restricted use and are inappropriate to say usually, but others consider them as mild/non-swear replacements for swear words and most others consider them to be just as mild as any other word in the language.

These words may gain some force when used to replace a swear word, especially if said with strong emotions. An example is “*angrily* You’re full of crap!” That use has more negativity than saying “Crap!” when you accidentally drop what you’re carrying or refer to something you dislike by saying “Oh, not that crap again.”

realsocialskills said:

Also sometimes the level of force is more important than which words are being used.

Some people’s “darn it” is more frightening than other people’s “fuck off”.

Avoiding slurs is not about sanitizing language

andreashettle:

realsocialskills:

Cussing is important. Here are some uses:

  • Expressing boundaries in forceful language
  • Expressing emphatic contempt
  • Expressing distress

Sometimes it’s ok to insult people. Sometimes it’s important to be rude.

Slurs aren’t part of this, though. It’s not ok to insult someone by comparing them to an oppressed group. It’s not ok to insult someone by referencing their membership in an oppressed group.

Lists of things to say rather than “that’s so gay" or “that’s so r-word" tend to be long lists of big words that are clean and polite. They shouldn’t be, though. There’s no moral obligation to use long words. There’s no moral obligation to always use clean language.

The problem with slurs is that they help to keep marginalized groups marginalized. They hurt innocent people, and they hurt guilty people in ways no one deserves.

So, when the situation calls for cussing at or about someone, use swear words. Don’t use slurs.

And if you can’t bring yourself to use swear words, ever, then STILL don’t use slurs. Use it as an opportunity to excercise your brain in creativity in devising insults or other forms of strong or emphatic language without using slurs or any of the swear words you aren’t comfortable with.

Yes. Slurs are *more* obscene than swears, not less.